Month: August 2019

The delightful practice of rereading.

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About a year ago, if we were in the middle of a conversation about books and our current reading life and you asked me if I was in the habit of rereading books, I probably would have thought that was a ridiculous question. Why would I ever want to reread a book, when there are so many books to read? This is a complete waste of time. In the past year, I have been persuaded otherwise. Now, I must say that not all books are created alike and some books are definitely not worth reading a second time. I would even venture to say that there are some books not even worth finishing. On the other side of that argument, there are many books worth rereading to discover the treasure you may have missed.

CS Lewis is probably one of my all time favorite authors. His thought provoking books will lead you on a journey into the world of literature he has created. The “Chronicles of Narnia” are an example of a book series that is worth rereading. The first time I was introduced to the world of Narnia, I was a child and I took considerable delight in the story that was set before me. Children enjoy the “Chronicles of Narnia” simply because its an amazing story. They are perhaps unaware of the deeper meaning embedded in the series, which you might see as an adult. CS Lewis once said “No book is worth reading at the age of ten which is not equally-and often far more-worth reading at the age of fifty and beyond.”

I started rereading the “Chronicles of Narnia” as a read aloud to my children. I am now convinced that everyone as an adult not just children should read the “Narnia” series. I loved the series as a child, but I loved it more as an adult. As a child, I enjoyed the story, but the deeper meaning of the text that the author was trying to convey went over my head. For example, there is this scene from the second book in the series called “Prince Caspian”. One of the main characters named Lucy and a lion named Aslan who is the King of the Kingdom are having a conversation. Lucy observes that Aslan has gotten bigger since the last time she saw him. Aslan’s response is “…every year you will grow, you will find me bigger”. I was sitting there reading this passage to my children and the meaning of this conversation caught me off guard as an adult. Aslan is allegorically a picture of Christ. As I grow in Christ, God becomes bigger in my life. As I understand who God is and what He is like, I understand more and more that He is the author of the impossible becoming possible. Reading this passage as a child did not have the same impact on me as an adult. I was slowly being persuaded that rereading might not be the waste of time I thought it to be.

I have recently joined a bookclub in the hope that it would help me expand my reading life. I am a creature of habit and reading the same type of books is a comfortable and easy place I don’t want to leave. The word “change” is a word I try to avoid instead of embrace. That being said, I knew I wanted to expand my reading life and a book club seemed like a motivating road to take. This month we read “Pride and Prejudice” by Jane Austen. This was my third reading of “Pride and Prejudice”. I enjoyed the book even more the third time, compared to previous readings. When you reread a book, you are able to slow down and see observations that you might have missed before, because you are already familiar with the storyline.

There were some observations that I noticed in reading “Pride and Prejudice” that I hadn’t in previous reads. What stood out to me was the pride and prejudice of Elizabeth Bennet. She had always appeared to be the heroine in my mind with very little flaws. This time however, I noticed how she seemed to have a prejudice against the women that surrounded her. Elizabeth Bennet’s character is quite harsh on the women in her life. Her observations of their behavior leads you to see Elizabeth thinking she is better than the people that surround her. On previous reads, I had always thought the title reflected Elizabeth Bennet to having the “Pride” and Mr. Darcy having the “Prejudice”. This time I noticed that the title actually reflects many of the characters having both pride and prejudice throughout the entire novel. I realized that perhaps Jane Austen might have meant a broader meaning in the use of her title. This was only one of the many new observations that captured my attention. “Pride and Prejudice” was definitely worth rereading.

My final example is a recent short novella that I read by Fredrik Backman called “And Every Morning The Way Home Gets Longer and Longer”. The first time I read this book, I thought it was a pleasing story, but I didn’t quite understand the plot line. I decided to read it a second time due to the author’s poetic style of writing with this novella. The first time, I had rushed through, wanting to know what happened in the story. I decided I needed to slow down to perhaps capture more of the message that the author was trying to convey. I am so glad I made the decision to slow down. Slowing down was necessary with this particular book to understand the beauty of what Fredrick Backman was writing. After the second time of reading this novella, I thought it was a touching and beautiful story worth reading.

Rereading great books is a delightful practice that I have now incorporated into my reading life. There are some books worth taking your time to read again. Rereading allows us to slow down and see perhaps things we might have missed on the first time around. I think C.S. Lewis gives us a thoughtful perspective on rereading in the following quote:

“We do not enjoy a story fully at the first reading. Not till the curiosity, the sheer narrative lust, has been given its sop and laid asleep, are we at leisure to savor the real beauties.”- C.S. Lewis

What are your favorite books that you have reread?

Do you think rereading is a waste of time or do you enjoy it as part of your reading life?

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Book Review: “And Every Morning The Way Home Gets Longer and Longer” by Fredrik Backman

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“My memories are running away from me, my love, like when you try to separate oil and water. I’m constantly reading a book with a missing page and it’s always the most important one.” (Fredrik Backman-“And Every Morning The Way Home Gets Longer and Longer”)

Synopsis:

This is a story of a Grandpa struggling to hold onto his memories and not forget those he loves. This is a story of a relationship between a grandpa and his grandson, and a dad and his son. They wrestle with the reality of having to say goodbye. Its a moving story about cherishing the moments you have with the ones you love. Being there to walk by their side until its time to say goodbye.

My Thoughts:

Fredrik Backman is a thought provoking author who takes you on a journey with his writing that allows you to become a part of his character’s world. I actually read this book twice because the first time, I was eager to see what happened, so I rushed through until the end. I decided to read it a second time at a slower pace. The first time I read it, I thought it was pleasing story, but I didn’t quite understand the entire plot line. Fredrik Backman writes in almost a poetic way with this novella. It is necessary to slow down to see the beauty in what he has written.

The second time I read this novella was an entirely different experience. I was able to comprehend the emotion and the beauty of the relationships between the Grandpa and his grandson. I had a front row seat to the struggle the Grandpa was experiencing as little by little, he was losing his memory. Alzheimer’s disease is an unfortunate reality for many elderly people in today’s society. Fredrik Backman gives perhaps a glimpse of insight into what a person might be going through as they fight the disease. He also did a beautiful job of showing what it meant to walk by someone’s side as they watch their loved one struggle with this disease. In the beginning of the book there is an author’s note where he states,

“This is a story about memories and about letting go. It’s a love letter and a slow farewell between a man and his grandson, and between a dad and his boy. I never meant for you to read it, to be quite honest. I wrote it just because I was trying to sort out my own thoughts, and I’m the kind of person who needs to see what I’m thinking on paper to make sense of it. But it turned into a small tale of how I’m dealing with slowly losing the greatest minds I know, about missing someone who is still here and how I wanted to explain it all to my children. I’m letting it go now, for what it’s worth” (Fredrik Backman)

Recommended For:

Fans of Fredrik Backman and those who love thought provoking writing that might give you insight into the world that surrounds us.

Book Review- “Educated” by Tara Westover

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Synopsis: Tara Westover is trapped in a family life that most outsiders would consider a nightmare, but in Tara’s mind, it’s her normal reality. Growing up in an extreme home life where they have a fear based belief that the government is after them was her “normal”. Her family did not believe in the use of medical care or in giving their children an education because it would result in a reliance on the government. She dealt with the craziness of her lifestyle based on the belief that this was how living life was supposed to be. This is the story of Tara Westover’s journey to rising above her circumstances and her quest to being educated. Her education was the key to her freedom.

My Thoughts:

Tara Westover is a brilliant author who captivates and holds the attention of her audience. I was caught up in the story and I desired to see what would happen next. I believe Tara accomplished what she set out to do as an author. She was able to convey her story and give the reader a clear picture of her experience and what she had walked out in her journey to being educated. I admire how she was able to rise above her circumstances, regardless of where she came from. The cards were stacked against her and yet she emerged out of the chaos victorious.

It took about 2 months to finish this book because of the disturbing journey that Tara had experienced. Tara Westover truly painted a captivating story but I wanted justice to be served. The abuse that the children experienced in the Westover home was unjust. Her parents should be punished for their treatment of their family. So, that being said, a pattern began to emerge with my journey in reading this book. I would read a few chapters and then let it sit on my shelf for a week where I would quickly pick up a happier book. This is probably a testament to the author’s amazing writing because of the anger it evoked in me to see her story unfold. If reading about abusive relationships is a trigger for you, this may not be the book for you to read.

What stood out to me about this book was the message about education. I believe each person is responsible for their own education. Each individual is responsible for their own desire to learn. Teachers can teach, but students have to embrace the learning. I can send my kids to the best schools or give them the best education possible, but they individually have to decide to learn. We cannot as teachers or parents force our children to learn. Being educated is a choice.

Education is a key to freedom. When my children attain a love of learning, it will open up more doors for them in the world. They will seek out the answers to the questions that exist daily in their minds. If my kids leave the nest, becoming life long learners, I have succeeded as a homeschool parent. I hope all my children make the decision to pursue higher education in their journey beyond my doors. Let my ceiling be their floor.

Tara Westover wrote a thought provoking memoir that will leave an impression in my mind for awhile. I am so delighted that she chose to rise above her circumstances and pursue an education.

Recommended For:

People who enjoy page turning memoirs that capture your attention until the end. Also, if you enjoy reading about a volatile family life that the protagonist is able to overcome, then you would enjoy this book. If abusive family relationships are a trigger for you, this may not be the book for you.

For more Bookish Content, you can find me on Instagram @booknerdmama5

Book Review-“The False Prince” by Jennifer Nielsen

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Synopsis:

Four orphan boys kidnapped against their will have the terrible decision to live a lie or choose to die. A kingdom is on the precipice of war and a treacherous plan is put into action by a nobleman named Conner who kidnaps these four orphan boys. His plan is to train them to become a prince that will fool the kingdom into thinking his long lost prince is finally home. They must choose to be trained or walk away to their deaths. Only one of the orphans will be chosen to be the false prince. Who will Conner choose? What will happen to the other three orphan boys? Will this stop the war and bring peace to the kingdom? This book contains mystery, adventure that will capture the reader’s attention. It is a journey worth taking.

My Thoughts:

Jennifer Nielsen has woven a tale that will have you on the edge of your seat until the very end. I read this book in about 2 days because I could not put it down. I delighted in how the story had a bit of mystery throughout the entire book. As I read the story I would see little by little more of the missing pieces that fit to complete the picture the author was trying to create. This book was fast paced and didn’t slow down. I may or may not have stayed up a little bit late, just to finish more of the book. I am not a fan of slow paced books. I need the plot to keep going and the characters be well developed to keep my attention. I think part of the reason, I enjoy a fast paced book is because I am limited on my time when I can actually read. I read in the edges of my day. I may only get 15 to 30 minutes to read so it is quite enjoyable when I find a book that can keep my attention even when I am limited with my time. I think Jennifer Nielsen did an amazing job of creating a story that young and old alike can enjoy. This will definitely be the next read aloud that I read with my kids. Teens would love to have this book on their bookshelf. The “False Prince” is also a wonderful book to recommend if you have reluctant teen reader.

Recommended For: I would say 10 years old and older. The book is clean but there are some older themes such as war and killing that a younger child may not like. Teens would love this book. Even though the genre is probably categorized as YA, this book is enjoyable for older as well.

For more of my bookish content you can find me on Instagram @booknerdmama5

“Inheritance” by Dani Shapiro

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“Inheritance” by Dani Shapiro is a memoir of her journey to discovering a family secret that will forever alter her perspective on how she looks at her life.

SPOILER ALERT- If you love memoirs that are introspective and contain family secrets, you would enjoy this book. Do not read reviews or the synopsis of this book if you want to discover the family secret on your own. The family secret reveals itself in the first couple of chapters. It is hard to write a synopsis without giving away what the family secret is. So if you love to be surprised, quit reading this review and go and read the book.

Synopsis-

A family secret has been kept from Dani all her life. The very existence of this secret will change the perspective Dani Shapiro has on her past and future. In 2016, Dani decides on a whim to learn more about her heritage by obtaining genetic testing. Much to her bewilderment, she finds out that her father is not her biological father. She discovers at the age of 54 that she is in no way related to the father that raised her. This sends her on a personal journey of disclosing where she came from and who she belongs to. She also raises the question on why her family would keep this secret from her. Dani Shapiro’s memoir follows her investigation in solving who she is and the mystery of her existence.

My Thoughts-

Dani Shapiro is an amazing writer. My attention was captured and I could see the journey that she walked in this discovery. I was intrigued by her descriptions of her Jewish culture that she was raised in. I loved the Hebrew that she sprinkled throughout her text. A couple of years ago, I had the privilege of going to Israel and learning briefly about the culture. Her descriptions of her family life made me want to go back.

Although Dani Shapiro is a gifted writer, which made it worth my reading time, I was frustrated with the amount of pages it took to talk about the one family secret of her origin. I cannot imagine how traumatic it would be to find out you did not come from the family that you thought you came from, but I do think the book dragged a bit on this one subject. I honestly think the book would have been boring, but Dani Shapiro was able to keep my attention due to the quality of her writing.

I would also like to explain that I am not a fan of being introspective on one subject, the story has to keep moving to keep my attention. As I was reading this memoir, I kept waiting for there to be deeper layers to the family secret or perhaps other family secret unveiled, but it was mostly Dani Shapiro’s journey and feelings on how she handled her discovery. I know that this is a popular book and so my taste definitely will not align with many people, but that is the beauty of humankind. We are all unique and I believe it would be boring if we all adored the same books.

I would give this book a 3/5 stars based on the quality of writing but lack of interest in my opinion.

Recommended For-

If you love introspective memoirs, wonderful writing, and a touch of mystery, then you will enjoy “Inheritance” by Dani Shapiro.

For more of my bookish content, you can find me on Instagram @booknerdmama5

Process of Letting Go

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When it comes to my kids, I hate this phrase.  What do you mean the process of letting go?!  These are children that I have carried in my womb for 9 months and I wanted to surround them with a mountain of bubble wrap to protect them from the outside world since they emerged to grace this earth with their presence.  To protect them from a fall or a broken heart is my job as their mom.  I am the hero that will save them!  

But the truth is, although I physically gave birth to each one of my children, they were never mine to begin with.  My husband and I are entrusted by God to help raise them. The truth is, that they are His.  The truth is, that I am not in control and cannot protect them from everything. Ironically, if I try to protect them from too much and not allow them to make mistakes in the safety of my home, then I might be setting them up for bigger falls when they leave the nest.  

So, I begin my journey to let go when they are young.  This is not an easy feat because I am a bit of a control freak by nature, the type of person who actually thinks that they have some control.  I have to fight this part of my personality and align with God’s intention in my parenting.  Yes, I am supposed to watch out for my children, give them wisdom as they grow and discipline when the need arises, but I am also supposed to let them make mistakes, let them fall and then pick them up.  

By nature, I am not what you would call “a nostalgic personality”.  I
don’t cry easily; even at funerals my eyes are dry and birthdays don’t
typically affect me in an emotional way.
But on the morning of my oldest son’s 18th birthday, I felt an immediate
panic and sadness that caught me off guard. I was surprised at the
intensity of emotion that came flooding over me. Had I prepared him
enough for life outside our home? Would he make good decisions? Would he be safe? Could he be successful in life due to the education I had given him?

I sat in my bed and my thoughts left me face to face with all of my
past mistakes; all the memories of each time I had failed as a mom. I
had to confront the reflection of my own inadequacy, and the decisions
I had made as a homeschool parent.
As I sat there, all I wanted was to go back and start over at the
beginning. If I had a time machine, I could go back and do it better.

I would raise my voice less.

I would hug that baby more often.

I would have lived “in the moment” with him- instead of worrying about
his future.

If I could go back, I would let go more.

Parents on the other side with grown children and more experience than me have related phrases such as “time flies” and “cherish the time that you have with your kids.”  I always had a bit of a dismissive attitude when I would hear them say this.  My unbelief was rooted in the amount of young babies I had at the time and the amount of diapers I was changing.  In my mind, in those moments of my life, this was not a quick process, but a Mt. Everest situation where I could not see the end in sight.  This definitely is not going to feel quick!  But you know what?  They were right.  Just a couple of months ago my oldest turned 18 and time did fly. I want to go back.  I can’t.  I’m learning to let go.